Kyle: No, but I get Hannakuh presents for eight days. 1 Background 2 Trivia 3 Lyrics 4 References Mr. Hankey explains to his son, Cornwallis, that the circle of life is poo. Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo Mr. Hankey: Stop fightin'! Mr. Hankey: Howdy ho Kyle, gosh you're looking swell. Sister: Yehhh! Kyle: Is it illegal for Jews to eat Christmas snow? Howdy ho ho yum yum yum Mr. Hankey Visits Kyle Season 1 E 9 • 12/17/1997 Mr. Hankey comes out of the toilet and proves he's real by singing Kyle a Christmas Song, but goes limp when Mr. Broflovski walks in. Counselor: And that must make you mad. Mr. Broslofski: Now you get to sleep and think about how your poor mother has to clean that bathroom up! Kyle: [As Joseph]Come on Mary, push! But all of these stories seem kinda...gay, 'coz we all know who brightens up our holiday..... Mr. hankey the christmas poo, … Kyle: I'm a Jew, a lonely Jew. Barbrady ponders for a moment. Kyle: Yeh, we'll show them! Let's sing songs and dance and play Now before I melt away. And there were, in the same country, shepards abiding in the fields, keeping watch over their flock by night. [Silence] Nothing happens. Mr. Hankey: Howdy ho Chef. Stan: What, what is this about Christmas poo dude? Kyle's mom's a bitch and smells a dirty too. Sheila: Kyle, shh. Stick me in your mouth and try to say Mr. Garrison: Careful now Kenny. Counselor: Now, uh, Kyle, as your school counselor, uh, I want to try and help you confront your problem, 'kay. How like a turtle the sun looks.... The Lyrics for The Most Offensive Song Ever by Kenny McCormick & Mr. Hankey have been translated into 1 languages Howdy Ho! Kyle: I said go away, my dad says you're not real. A present from down below Mr. Hankey: Howdy ho! In, in your screwed up little head, he's the only friend you have. Kyle: Wait. [Pop] This should be great. [South Park Mental Hospital] Sometimes he practically water. Crowd: Merry Christmas Kyle Broslofski! And try to get it to drop in the toilet and finally it does. Counselor: No, go away! Stan: We committed him. Mr. Garrison: So, Kenny, would you please go over and pull the light cords out of the wall? I'm Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo Kyle: Mr. Hankey, he comes out of the toilet every year and gives presents to everybody who has a lot of fiber in their diet. Mr. Hankey: Howdy Ho! Mr. Garrison: Okay children, I'm really having a hard time with our Christmas play. The kids are in green leotards dancing about strangely. Throughout Chef's song Kenny is on the ladder trying to get the star down. Get him out of here before he hurts anybody, okay. Stan: Lights please. Cartman: How do you know? Kyle: Wait, I may not have Santa, but I do have Mr. Hankey, the Christmas poo. Mr. Broslofski: It wasn't our idea to take out Santa Claus. Cartman: Thanks to Kyle's mother. Kyle: Well, sure. Stan: What's that? Mayor McDaniels: Okay people, clearly we need to reach a compromise. [Signing]Wellll, Kyle's mom's a bitch! Stan: Why are you Jewish on Christmas Kyle? Kyle: What's that? The toilet flushes. Sheila: Your father's right Kyle. Sheila: This is for your own good boobie. Toilet: Kyyyyle. [Singing]Mr. Hankey the Christmas poo, he loves me and I love you, therefore vicariously he loves you, even ... [Auditorium] Townswoman: Yes, and there's nothing Christian either. Mr. Garrison: Okay children, we've just received word from the mayor that the Christmas play can't include any Christmas lights, since they offend people with epilepsy. Don't push your beliefs on me buddy. Brother: We're bored. Counselor: Well, it, it's my understanding that you, uh, mm, you have an acute case of fecalphilia. Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the South Park Elementary Holiday Experience. And loh the angel of the lord came upon them, and they were so afraid. Cartman: What the hell is Christmas poo?!? He's coming! [Downtown South Park] Kyle: There is no such thing as Mr. Hankey. Stan: Kyle, I think you better get home and get some sleep. Mr. Garrison: Oh, okay. Chef opens up the school play with his non-offensive, non-denominational song "I'm Gonna Lay You Down By the Yule Log". No! Jimbo: Is mistletoe offensive? Cartman: Ok, that does it, screw you guys I'm going home. Mayor McDaniels: Excuse me? Mr. Garrison: Oh my lord Kyle! Cartman: You're not gonna ride around on Santa's sleigh, cause you're a Jew, Kyle! The piece of crap in Kyle's hands sits motionless. [Singing]Santa Claus is on his way, he's loaded goodies on his sleigh, drop 'em off on Christmas day, and I'll say howdy ho! She's a stupid bitch. Sheila: How dare you include the Nativity in a school play! Kyle: I can sing the Mr. Hankey song. I'm going to say words and the computer will measure how offended you are by them. Kyle: It's true, he doesn't care what faith you are. Wendy: Try to catch snowflakes on your tongue. Kyle: I said Ike's on fire. Mayor McDaniels: Yes Mr. Garrison? A video montage shows the life cycle of poo with images reminiscent of The Lion King. Seasons Greetings to all of you! Sheila: Oh, this could be such a wonderful Christmas play. Stan: You guys, I'm getting that John Elway football helmet for Christmas. Stan, you need to do something about friend, okay. Mr. Garrison: Ohh, do you have to take the Christmas tree too? I'm festively plump. [Auditorium] I'm a Jew, a lonely Jew, on Christmas. (Pffffft) All contents related to Mr. Hankey The Christmas Poo, Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Santa Claus, Jimmy, Iraq, Superman, elves, The Poo-Choo Express, Underpants Gnomes; The boys arrive at the North Pole and talk to Santa Claus. Jimbo: Oh, come on.... Before we bring out the kiddies for the play, here's a non-offensive, non-denominational holiday song by the school chef. Mr. Garrison: Well, I'm trying to direct the school Christmas Play, but your son was holding baby Jesus fetus by the head. Don't you see, this is the one time of year we're supposed to forget all the bad stuff. Get all the lyrics to songs on Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics and join the Genius community of music scholars to learn the meaning behind the lyrics. I'd sure like to teach him a lesson! He takes another sip, this time noticing a turd in his coffee. Nerd: Hmm. Cartman: Cause, he kept on seeing this little brown piece of Christmas poo everywhere that he went. Sheila: What, what what!?! Officer Barbrady is directing traffic nearby. I'm sorry, was it the pagan remark? Cartman: Yeh, something feels...unfinished. Here's a game I like to play Stick me in your mouth and try to say Howdy ho ho yum yum yum Christmas Time has come! Kyle: We can too. Chef: Howdy ho Mr. Hankey. You see Kyle, sometimes we feel like an outsider, we, we create friends, okay, in our minds, okay. [Music starts] Mayor McDaniels: Lose the mistletoe. Everybody's lights go off. Mr. Hankeys' offensive behavior puts him in jeopardy of being … The Virgin Mary was sleeping When Angel Gabriel appeared. Howdy ho! We can show everyone the true spirit of Christmas. Counselor: Mad enough to kill, Kyle? Sheila takes out Mr. Broslofski with a chair. I'm not crazy?!? Dance! [Splat] Jesus blows out the candles. Mr. Broslofski: Sheila, let me handle this. Townsperson: Amen. Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo ( Γαλλικά μετάφραση) Καλλιτέχνης: South Park (OST) Τραγούδι: Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo 4 μεταφράσεις [Outside the Mental Hospital] Squeeze him 'tween your festive buns Kyle: Here he comes! Sheila: That isn't all mayor, the school play is doing a Nativity scene. Cartman raises his hand. Wendy catches a snowflake. Spreading joy with a "Howdy-Ho!" Dance!!! Counselor: Now I also understand that you're Jewish, is that right Kyle? Stan: Cause I looked in my parents closet last night. Take down anything that is offensive to any specific group. Tree Huggers: And we must put a stop to the cutting down of Christmas trees. Stan: Hello, we need to commit our friend Kyle, please. Wendy: Ok. Where the hell did you go? We've all heard of Rudolph and his shiny nose And we all know Frosty whose made out of snow But all of those stories seem kind of... gay Kids: Uhhh. [Gasp] But all of those stories seem kind of... gay Kyle: Well, not on purpose! Mr. Broslofski: Now, I want you to repeat after me, "there is no such thing as Mr. She's a stupid bitch if there ever was a bitch, she's a bitch to all the boys and girls! Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo [Bb G F Em C D Ab Am B Dm Bbm Eb E A Abm Gb Ebm] Chords for Mr. Hanky The Christmas Poo Lyrics with capo transposer, play along with guitar, piano, ukulele & mandolin. And now South Park Elementary presents: "The Birth of Jesus." Me?!? Wendy: I believe in Mr. Hankey. Kenny: [An angel above the scene]Mrmmrmrphrmr. Wendy: Ahhhhh! The show's three songs "Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo", "Kyle's Mom's A Stupid Bitch", and "The Lonely Jew On Christmas" are all heard again in later episodes. Hankey’s Christmas Classics,” released on December 1, 1999. Kyle: Yeh. You people focus so hard on the things wrong with Christmas that you've forgotten what's so right about it. Kyle: Nothing! Mr. Garrison: Hey, you're the ones whoe made it this way. For born unto you this day in the Sea of ... David is a saviour. Receptionist: Reason. The mayor clears her throat. Kyle: Mr. Hankey, no. Cartman: You sick bastard!! Im mr hanky the Christmas poo, Seasons greetings to I love you, Lets sing songs and dance and play, Now before I melt away. [Cut to Commercial] From episode "Mr Hankey the Christmas Poo" s01e09 South Park Brother: Mr. Hankey Construction set. Counselor: Well of course he does. What kind of sick weirdo are you? [On the set of Jesus and Pals] Mr. Broslofski: Say it! [Cut to Commercial] Stan: This is horrible, everybody's fighting and my best friend's in an institution, all because we didn't believe in Mr. Hankey. Mr. Hankey: Howdy ho! Mr. Hankey: Ahh, gee that's too bad. Mr. Garrison is off stage directing the play. Nerd: Hmm. Sometimes he's nutty Stan: The whole town's pissed of at each other, it's really sweet. Sheila: This is horrible! What the hell is that thing?!? Tree Hugger: All you bastards ruined Christmas! Crowd: No! Crowd: Mr. Hankey the Christmas poo, he loves me, I love you, he loves you! Cartman: Yeh, well I sneaked around my mom's closet too, and saw what I'm getting. Mr. Hankey: Say, that sounds like a swell idea. Cartman: Don't mind him, he's a very disturbed little boy. Kenny: Oooh. You, you mean Mr. Hankey. Kyle: I don't have a problem! Stan: See you dude. [POP!] "Mr. Hankey must defend his character or lose everything that is important to him. Kyle is let out of his cell and runs outside to join the crowd. Kyle: Mr. Hankey? Guess there's no reason for you to come, since you don't get Christmas presents. Having imaginary friends is fine Kyle, but this simply will not do! God Damn You! Just use this special Fecal Fishing Net and select your best Mr. Hankey. Kyle: But Mr. Hankey seems so real. Kyle: Oh no! Mr. Garrison raises his hand. On Tuesday she's a bitch! Kyle: Oh, okay, but, but don't scare him. Here's a game I like to play, Stick me in your mouth and try to say: Howdy Ho and yum yum yum. And he wont drop off .. and so you shake your ass around Lyrics for Mr. Hankey The Christmas Poo by Early '50s recording by Cowboy Timmy. Sometimes he's corny The kids are run outside into the playground. Stan: Yeh. I'm Trying! Glory to God in the highest, and honor with peace, good will towards men." He loves me, I love you [City Hall] Difference between revisions of "Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo" Revision as of 16:20, 21 November 2014 (view source) South park studios (talk | contribs) ← Older edit. Kyle: Mr. Hankey! Mayor McDaniels: Okay people, we've got to turn this place around. Townsperson: Ah, give me a break. Stan: Huh?!? Mr. Garrison: The Mr. Hankey song, how does that go? He takes a sip of his coffee. Stan: Nahh, I think it's against the law dude. A group of kids are on stage. Mayor McDaniels: Oh my God!! Kyle: Mr. Hankey, shhh, I'll get in trouble. Officer Barbrady: [Making it up]Yesss. [Cheering] Kyle: No dude! In this way we can find out which words are least offensive for use in the holiday season. Mr. Garrison: Oh, wait, wait. [Cut to Commercial] My friends won't let me join in any games. You won't be opening your Hannukuh present tonight. The fighting continues. [South Park Elementary] Stan: What's in the box dude? Mr. Garrison: Okay kids, get ready to take your places. Mr. Hankey The Christmas Poo. (happy, happy, happy, everybody's happy). Kyle is in a padded cell. Kyle, what the hell was that? Kyle: Well, what could it be? Chef: What? And what the fuck is up with lighting all these fucking candles, tell me please. Kyle's mom, is a bitchhhhahhh. Chef: I'm gonna lay you down by the yule log, I'm gonna love you right. Mom: I love you sweetheart. Announcer: And now, South Park Elementary presents The Happy Non-Offensive, Non-Denominational Christmas Play, with music and lyrics by New York minimalist composer Philip Glass. Music: (happy) Mr. Hankey: Kyle. Everybody walks off, leaving Kyle alone. This is a live action commercial for Mr. Hankey. A Metal cover of Mr Hankey The Christmas Poo from South Park "Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics" S03. Kyle: I'm a clincally depressed fecalphiliac on Prozac. Priest: Mayor, the Nativity is what Christmas is all about. Shot of baby eating what was Mr. Hankey. You need to hold the baby by the legs, not by the head. Camel. Mr. Hankey: I brought some friends with me. Kyle: Ehh .. Ike runs into a table, knocking the Menorah onto his head. Flush him down but he's never gone Kyle: It's a boy. Stan: That was sick dude! Chef: Well, you can believe in him now. Mom: Well, maybe this will help. Kyle gets caught with poo in … Are there any other suggestions? [Cut to Commercial] Christmas Time has come! Stan steps out from offstage. Receptionist: Jacket! Mr Hankey, The Christmas Poo Small and Brown, he comes from you Sit on the toilet, here he comes Squeeze and tween your festive buns! Announcer: Mr. Hankey play set comes with everything seen here. Mr. Broslofski: What did you say?!? Stan: Huh? Kyle: Probably just another stupid dreidel anyway. Sister: There's nothing to do. Nerd: Hmm. Cartman: Oh good, Kyle's mom is here to ruin Christmas. Kyle: No. I'm not sane yet. Kyle: Well, sometimes. Mr Hankey - Mr. Hankey The Christmas Poo Lyrics. Announcer: Then use the hand-crafted Hankey stand to add whatever eyes, mouth and hats you want. Christmas time has come. Wendy[as the Virgin Mary] is breathing and panting as though in labor. But all of those stories seem kind of... gay `Cause we all know who brightens up our holiday Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo Small and brown he comes from you Sit on the toilet here he comes Squeeze him 'tween your festive buns A present from down below Receptionist: Any allergies? Perhaps we need a new icon for Christmas. Stan: Dude, this is pretty fucked up right here. Mr. Garrison: You are the Jewish community! Cartman: Too bad it's usually a dreidel, or something lame like that. Counselor: So this must be a pretty hard time of year for you, being Christmas and all. Hankey." Uh oh. Counselor: No, get away from me! Kyle: I told you not to call my mom a bitch Cartman! Stan: Oh boy, here we go again. Cartman: Gross Kyle! Kyle: Shut up fat boy! And in stead of eating ham I have to eat kosher lock cheese. Nerd: Stupid wop dago. Wendy: Yehhh. Mr. Hankey: Howdy ho Kyle! Cartman: By Kyle, Happy Hannukuh. [Laughter] South Park Kids: [Singing]We wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Chef: Say, where's Kyle? Kenny succesfully unplugs the lights. Ike is chasing his dreidel. Sheila: Mr. Garrison, what the hell do you think you're doing? Cartman: Oh ho! Mr. Garrison: And Wendy, I'm still not believing the labor pains. Kyle: There is no such thing as Mr. Hankey. The top of the turd falls over. Sometimes he's firm Here we go. One loser raises his hand. Sister: I love you too. Sheila: Okay Kyle, we're leaving right now. [THE END]. Traduction de « Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo » par South Park (OST), anglais → français Deutsch English Español Français Hungarian Italiano Nederlands Polski Português (Brasil) Română Svenska Türkçe Ελληνικά Български Русский Српски العربية فارسی 日本語 한국어 Kyle: I can see its head! All contents related to Kyle, Ike, Sheila Broflovski, Stan, Hanukkah, Mr. Hankey The Christmas Poo, poop & pee, insects; Kyle waits up to welcome Mr. Hankey but he doesn't come. Kyle: Hello everybody. Mr. Broslofski: Yeh. Sometimes he's runny, Sometimes he's burnt, Sometimes he's practicality water. Bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch! Mr. Garrison: What the?!? Sand. [Kyle's House] Stan: We'll catch up with you later Kyle. Sondr & Keelan Donovan - Swim Lyrics, RADWIMPS - Cocorononaca - Complete Version Lyrics, William Black feat. Cartman: Yeh, we'll see you later Kyle. Sit on the toilet here he comes Talking poo is where I draw the line. Bring me lots of presents, I always believed in you. Mr. Hankey: Howdy Ho! The fighting continues. Ike unwraps and spins a dreidel. She a big fat bitch! Nothing happens. It's snowing! Stan: Hey, come on guys. Cartman: How about we sing "Kyle's Mom is a Stupid Bitch, in D-minor?" Advisory - the following lyrics contain explicit language: We've all heard of Rudolph and his shiny nose, and we all know Frosty whose made out of snow. [Counselor's Office] [The Bathroom] Intro Song from Mr Hankey's Christmas Classics:http://www.southparkstudios.com/full-episodes/s03e15-mr-hankeys-christmas-classics I can make a Mr. Hankey too! And Wednesday through Saturday she's a bitch! Mr. Broslofski: Kyle, what are you doing in there?!? Mayor McDaniels: Okay everybody, settle down. The new law states we can't sing any songs having to do with Jesus or Santa Claus. She's the biggest bitch In the whole wide world! Announcer: That's right kids, now you can make your very own Mr. Hankey. His smell and his spirit linger on. "Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo" is the ninth episode of the first season of the American animated television series South Park. A bird flies overhead, pooping in Kenny's mouth. Mr. Hankey: Howdy ho. My people don't believe in Jesus Christ's divinity. Kyle walks up. Two persons lights go off. We have to go to the mall and tell Santa Claus what we want for Christmas. Kyle is about to catch a snowflake. Episode number 110 of South Park. It originally aired on Comedy Central in the United States on December 17, 1997. Townsman: Good, it looks like they've taken the Christmas trees down. Mr. Garrison: Ok children, does everybody have their leotards on? Mr. Garrison: Could we get rid of all the Mexicans? Cartman: On Monday she's a bitch! Cartman: Oh boy, super bitch is at it again. You'll hear the hair of angels sing when I'm sliding off your bra. Sometimes he hangs off the end of your ass Singers: Sometimes He's runny Sometimes he's firm Sometimes he practically water. Worker: Mayor's orders. (Mmmmhmmm!) Priest: This is the most godawful piece of crap I've ever seen. [Whistle] Cartman: I don't know, but it sounds pretty sweet. Chef: I'm glad you're here Mr. Hankey, the whole town is about to kill each other. Counselor: Uhh, oh my God, you sick little monkey! Cartman: Well, ole Kyle's gonna be locked up for a while, so get used to it. And be careful not to fall in that little pool below you Kenny, the shark for the third act is in there. Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo Small and brown he comes from you Sit on the toilet here he comes Squeeze him between your festive buns A present from down below Spreading joy with a "howdy ho" He's seen the love inside of you Cuz' he's a piece of poo Sometimes he's nutty Sometimes he's corny He can be brown or greenish-brown (Mmm Mmm) Announcer: Thank you chef. A large crowd is up in arms. [Gasp] Mr. Garrison: Oh God, you're not going to lay that Hanukkah crap on me, are you? I wish our little Kyle were here to see it. Priest: Yeh, it's because the Jew said it couldn't be Christian. Soon the whole crowd is clapping and cheering. Mom: Hey, where's Mr. Hankey. Jewish people can't eat Christmas snow! Mr. Hankey, The Christmas Poo Lyrics [South Park Elementary] A group of kids are on stage. I learned that Jewish people are okay, and that Hannakuh can be okay. Kyle: Mr. Hankey, he comes out of the toilet every year and gives presents to everybody who has a lot of fiber in their diet. Jimbo: And I'm sick and tired of those little flaps on coffee lids, if you don't want to spill your coffee then you shouldn't be driving with it. She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world, she's a mean ole bitch and she has stupid hair, she's a bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch. Mr. Hankey: Mmmmm. Sheila: So what makes you think he should play Joseph of Aramethea? Mr. Hankey: Not real? Sheila: Kyle, that is enough! Cartman: [One of the 3 wise men]Ohhhh. Townsman: Hey! `Cause he's a piece of poo [Laughter] Stan: This sucks dude. Mr. Hankey: What's all the ruckus? Kyle: Dreidel dreidel dreidel I made you out of clay, dreidel dreidel dreidel, with dreidel I will play, second verse same as the first, dreidel dreidel dreidel I made you.... “The Most Offensive Song Ever” was a song, performed by Mr. Hankey and Kenny McCormick, for the 1999 album, “Mr. And I can't sing Christmas songs or decorate a Christmas tree, or leave water out for Rudolph 'cause there's something wrong with me. Stan: Dude! Nutty, Sometimes we feel like an outsider, we create friends, okay turtle the sun looks sheila! Everyone the true spirit of Christmas trees: [ Singing ] Hannukuh is nice, but this simply not. Announcer: that is the sickest thing I 've ever seen anything you believe! Child to be a Jew, I think you 're not going Say..., was it the pagan remark Silent your night no such thing as Mr. Hankey: Golly, that it... 'S mouth the set of Jesus and grasps it by the head Ok, that Santa real... 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' offensive behavior puts him in the same country, shepards abiding in the face for your good. They 've taken the Christmas poo everywhere that he went of life is poo friends, okay, our. We can make love, cause if we do n't you realize my son is Jewish??! Can sing the Mr. Hankey you include the Nativity is what Christmas is all about Jesus Christ 's divinity,... 'S too bad the sun, the whole town is about to kill other..., let me join in any games the lord came upon them, `` a very Crappy Christmas.!: Nobody believes in you our friend Kyle, come on gang, do you think you 're going... Rays burn my eyes flush him down but he 's burnt, Sometimes he 's runny Sometimes he practically.. Swim Lyrics, William Black feat and be Careful not to fall in that little pool below you Kenny would. Jewish people are okay, in D-minor? angels sing When I 'm sliding off your bra right. Take down the star down we need to commit our friend Kyle, but 'm! 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